Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Here we go...



Hey.  My name is liz.  My heart is fluttering like a hummingbird's wings right now.  I cannot believe that I am starting a blog. 

Only recently have I become comfortable with social media. I've had - hmm - how shall I put this?  A delayed adulthood. I'm almost forty years old, and I am barely beginning to get the hang of living my life.  And due to delayed development, I usually joke, that, the last thing I need is to be found.  

My delusions of grandeur whisper, the ubiquitous 'they' are looking for me, and if I put myself OUT THERE, the long lost friend from grade school, looking to recapture our memories of the monkey bars, will find me.  It pains me to imagine an ex boyfriend (who is, probably, successful in every way, I am not) stumbling upon my Facebook wall, smirking while, reading my latest post about how another one of my fledgling futures, I somehow Scotch taped together, has been dashed, once again, by my own hand.

No, anonymity is the way to go.  But, I want to write.  And I want others to read what I write.  So, is anonymity what I really want?  This is where the rub lies, people.

Only people who have their shit together would start something like a blog.  But if one's past helps to predict one's future, my fine day may never arrive.  

I need help in disciplining myself to write.  The only way I am going to get better is to practice the act of writing.  I've been consistently writing in my journal lately and I wanted to kick it up a notch.  This lead me to begin reading and researching other people's blogs.  I began to think that I, too, could start a blog.  In my search for accountability, I contacted several writing gigs posted on Craigslist and submitted various writing samples.  Many have replied and all have been positive.  My momentum mounted.  I decided to bring my blog uncertainties to my meditation practice, and in spite of all my limiting beliefs I feel compelled to write.  Secretly, I think that the recent uncontrollable urge to put myself OUT THERE is the necessary nourishment I need to heal.

So, here we go....  

             


4 comments :

  1. This is awesome Elizabeth. I believe you have a wonderful talent and your witt shines through your smile. We've all been through rough roads some more than others. This defines your character. Shine on homie. People NEED to see our light. It gives hope.

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  2. Hey Liz...You are amazing! I am so proud of you...keep it up! You have such a talent and you should share it with the world! love you!

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  3. Well written Liz,i could actually see that as being the beginning of a book about an aspiring writer called Liz!You play your character well!haha :)

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